Fonster's Intuition

I don't want reality...I just want disney... .

2011-10-29T22:37:00.002+08:00

An Exceptional Moment

2011-10-16T22:14:00.001+08:00

Will: What if we were to have good timing. For even an hour. What would that look like?

Alicia: I think that would look like an exceptional moment.

- The Good Wife S2E23: Closing Arguments -

Liking someone or just attracted to the feeling of reciprocal liking?

2011-10-16T22:02:00.001+08:00

Seems to be under a spell that I just can't break away from... ...

2011-10-09T19:25:00.010+08:00

Would this turn out to be a mess again?

Why can’t I just shake off the drama and pull myself away?

Why am I acting as if I’m under some kind of spells?

Why can’t I continue to distance myself?

Why does the most obvious choice of action seem to be the hardest thing to do?

Why can’t I just truly believe that Disney doesn’t exist in the real world!?

Not to me at least.

2011-10-05T23:03:00.001+08:00

2011-10-04T21:07:00.002+08:00

2011-10-02T19:08:00.002+08:00

Take The Lead

2011-10-01T22:57:00.012+08:00

Sometimes it happens in an instance.
We step up, we see a path forward.
We see a path and we take it.
Even when we have no idea where we're going.

-Meredith Grey in Grey's Anatomy S8E3: Take The Lead-

2011-10-01T17:58:00.002+08:00

2011-10-01T17:57:00.002+08:00

You have no idea how hard it is to pretend it doesn't matter and stop thinking and hoping for it... ... .

2011-09-28T00:58:00.001+08:00

Katy Perry - Firework

2011-09-25T22:21:00.006+08:00

Do you ever feel like a plastic bag
Drifting through the wind, wanting to start again
Do you ever feel, feel so paper thin
Like a house of cards, one blow from caving in

Do you ever feel already buried deep?
Six feet under screams, but no one seems to hear a thing
Do you know that there's still a chance for you
'Cause there's a spark in you?

You just gotta ignite the light and let it shine
Just own the night like the 4th of July

'Cause baby, you're a firework
Come on, show 'em what you're worth
Make 'em go, oh, oh, oh
As you shoot across the sky

Baby, you're a firework
Come on, let your colors burst
Make 'em go, oh, oh, oh
You're gonna leave 'em falling down

You don't have to feel like a waste of space
You're original, cannot be replaced
If you only knew what the future holds
After a hurricane comes a rainbow

Maybe you're reason why all the doors are closed
So you could open one that leads you to the perfect road
Like a lightning bolt, your heart will blow
And when it's time, you'll know

You just gotta ignite the light and let it shine
Just own the night like the 4th of July

'Cause baby you're a firework
Come on, show 'em what you're worth
Make 'em go, oh, oh, oh
As you shoot across the sky

Baby, you're a firework
Come on, let your colors burst
Make 'em go, oh, oh, oh
You're gonna leave 'em falling down

Boom, boom, boom
Even brighter than the moon, moon, moon
It's always been inside of you, you, you
And now it's time to let it through

'Cause baby you're a firework
Come on, show 'em what you're worth
Make 'em go, oh, oh, oh
As you shoot across the sky

Baby, you're a firework
Come on, let your colors burst
Make 'em go, oh, oh, oh
You're gonna leave 'em falling down

Boom, boom, boom
Even brighter than the moon, moon, moon
Boom, boom, boom
Even brighter than the moon, moon, moon

Maroon 5 with Lady Antebellum - Out of Goodbyes

2011-09-25T22:15:00.001+08:00

M2M - The Day You Went Away

2011-09-25T21:31:00.000+08:00

Taylor Swift - White Horse

2011-09-25T21:27:00.001+08:00

Taylor Swift - Back To December

2011-09-25T21:19:00.002+08:00

Keane - Somewhere Only We Know.

2011-09-25T21:15:00.003+08:00

False Pretence

2011-09-25T14:10:00.006+08:00

Survival

2011-09-19T00:01:00.003+08:00

We've all heard the saying. It's one of those things you learn in seventh grade science class. Adapt or die. Adapting isn't easy though. You have to fight your competition and off their attacks. And sometimes, you have to kill. You do what you need to do to survive.

- Meredith Grey in Grey's Anatomy S7E21: I Will Survive -

Happy Alone

2011-09-17T19:47:00.005+08:00

"There is a reason I said I'd be happy alone. It wasnt because I thought I would be happy alone. It was because I thought if I loved someone and then it fell apart, I might not make it. It's easier to be alone. Because what if you learn that you need love? And then you don't have it. What if you like it? And lean on it? What if you shape your life around it? And then it falls apart? Can you even survive that kind of pain? Losing love is like organ damage. It's like dying. The only difference is, death ends. This? It could go on..."

- Meredith Grey in Grey's Anatomy S7E22: Unaccompanied Minor -

Live in the moment and make it so beautiful that it will be worth remembering...It doesn't matter if I don't possess it.

2011-08-28T20:04:00.005+08:00

This is the Life I am living and will continue with Courage

2011-08-20T23:06:00.002+08:00

That's Me... ... To Love and Accept Me For Who I am... ... .

2011-08-20T22:42:00.004+08:00

Insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and yet expect to receive a different outcome.

2011-05-31T00:42:00.001+08:00

Inner Peace

2011-05-30T10:52:00.002+08:00

Déjà vu

2011-05-29T19:55:00.004+08:00

What happened in the past 2 weeks was Déjà vu all over again...you thought you already knew what was coming and where it would lead to...but you still fall into it for the thrill of wishing the slightness possibility of a different outcome. Well, it's probably the hope of getting it right for once...after being in the wrong for like a million times. Naive? Maybe...there is a saying "when the Stupid neither forgive nor forget and the Smart forgive but do not forget - it's the Naive that forgive and forget".

Reconnecting

2011-05-29T19:36:00.004+08:00

Too caught up with working life which led me to stop connecting with my inner self & expressing my inner thoughts for a number of months...that shouldn't be the way...a quote from Lee Iacocca - "The discipline of writing something down is the first step toward making it happen." On that note, I should take baby steps into reconnecting...starting from this moment... .

Circles

2010-12-27T00:51:00.002+08:00

I don't know how my past has brought me to this present, and

I don't know how my present will lead me to the future.

I feel that I'm going round and round in circles, with no beginning and without the end.

Surrender

2010-10-24T20:11:00.001+08:00

Even when our hopes give way to reality and we finally have to surrender to the truth, it just means we've lost today battle. Not tomorrow's war. Here's the thing about surrender, once you do it, actually give in, you forget why you were even fighting in the first place.

- Quote from Grey Anatomy S5 Sweet Surrender -

Trauma

2010-10-24T19:03:00.002+08:00

Doesn't matter how tough we are, trauma always leaves a scar. It follows us home, it changes our lives, trauma messes everybody up, but maybe that's the point. All the pain and the fear and the crap. Maybe going through all of that is what keeps us moving forward. It's what pushes us. Maybe we have to get a little messed up, before we can step up.

- Quote from Grey Anatomy S5 Elevator Love Letter -

The Other Side of This Life

2010-09-11T21:08:00.002+08:00

"Maybe we accept the dream has become a nightmare. We tell ourselves that reality is better. We convince ourselves it's better that we never dream at all. But, the strongest of us, the most determined of us, holds on to the dream or we find ourselves faced with a fresh dream we never considered. We wake to find ourselves, against all odds, feeling hopeful. And, if we're lucky, we realize in the face of everything, in the face of life the true dream is being able to dream at all"

- Quote from Grey Anatomy S3 The Other Side of This Life -

Wishin' and Hopin'

2010-09-05T21:28:00.002+08:00

"...what patients really want to know is - will the pain go away? Will I feel better? Am I cured? What our patients really want to know is - is there hope? But, inevitably, there are times when you find yourself in the worst case scenario. When the patient's body has betrayed them and all the science we have to offer has failed them. When the worst case scenario comes true, clinging to hope is all we've got left."

"...we live in a world of worse case scenarios. We cut ourselves off from hoping for the best because too many times the best doesn’t happen. But every now and then something extraordinary occurs and suddenly best case scenarios seem possible. And every now and then something amazing happens, and against our better judgment we start to have hope."

- Quotes from Grey Anatomy S3 Wishin' and Hopin'-

Scars and Souvenirs

2010-08-29T01:41:00.003+08:00

What's worse? New wounds which are so horribly painful or old wounds that should've healed years ago and never did? Maybe our old wounds teach us something, they remind us where we've been and what we've overcome, they teach us lessons about what to avoid in the future. That's what we like to think, but that's not the way it is, is it? Somethings you just have to learn over and over and over again.

- Grey Anatomy S3 Scars and Souvenirs Ending Quote -

All efforts made to make up for past mistakes will ultimately be worthwhile. Sift the sand and find the gold!

2010-08-15T18:07:00.002+08:00

Embrassing Miscommunication

2010-08-12T19:31:00.012+08:00

A month ago, Guy and Gal accidentally had a locking lips incident. They both agreed not to let this moment of weakness ruin their potentially cool friendship.

Out of the blue one day, Gal who was aboard for a stressful job training + under extreme cold weather (hence maybe that's why she was cranky)received a text from Guy.

Guy's text: I tried hard not to find it all very weird...but failed ;)

Gal's text: U are making me so confused. So does that mean u want me to be out of your life completely?

Guy's text: Er...no, im the one that is confused now. I was talking about the parade being entertaining....!

Gal's text: Oh shit...embrassing...just ignore. We re good.

Guy's text: No worries ;)

Narrator: What the F****??!!

That's it!

2010-06-14T20:19:00.003+08:00

That's it!

- The end of this journey is the start of the next adventure -

It doesn’t matter at all what I want - it’s dependent upon what life can give me!

2010-06-12T18:27:00.000+08:00

De Profundis (Extract) ~ by Oscar Wilde

2010-06-08T00:28:00.004+08:00

Suffering is one very long moment. We cannot divide it by seasons. We can only record its moods, and chronicle their return. With us time itself does not progress. It revolves. It seems to circle round one centre of pain. The paralysing immobility of a life every circumstance of which is regulated after an unchangeable pattern, so that we eat and drink and lie down and pray, or kneel at least for prayer, according to the inflexible laws of an iron formula: this immobile quality, that makes each dreadful day in the very minutest detail like its brother, seems to communicate itself to those external forces the very essence of whose existence is ceaseless change.

An act can cause a ripple of unknown effects and consequences.

2010-06-07T22:42:00.002+08:00

What About Me ~ Shannon Noll

2010-06-06T17:36:00.001+08:00

Well there's a little boy waiting at the counter of a corner shop
He's been waiting down there, waiting half the day
They never ever see him from the top
He gets pushed around, knocked to the ground
He gets to his feet and he says

[CHORUS:]
What about me, it isn't fair
I've had enough now i want my share
Can't you see i wanna live
But you just take more than you give

Well there's a pretty girl serving at the counter of the corner shop
She's been waiting back there, waiting for her dreams
Her dreams walk in and out they never stop
Well she's not too proud to cry out loud
She runs to the street and she screams

[CHORUS]

So take a step back and see the little people
They may be young but they're the ones
That make the big people big
So listen, as they whisper
What about me

And now i'm standing on the corner all the world's gone home
Nobody's changed, nobody's been saved
And i'm feeling cold and alone
I guess i'm lucky, i smile a lot
But sometimes i wish for more than i've got

[CHORUS]

The Quotes that I Lurve from 'The Good Wife' - Season 1

2010-06-05T22:16:00.007+08:00

Alicia: You won't feel like it. But put on nice clothing. Force yourself to. Not for public. For you.

Client: Does it ever get easier?

Alicia: No, but you do get better at it.

--------------------------------------------------------

Peter: When I get out, it will all go back to normal.

Alicia: Nothing will ever go back to normal.

--------------------------------------------------------

Kalinda: You oughta try it some time.

Alicia: Flipping someone off?

Kalinda: It's good for your soul.

--------------------------------------------------------

Jackie: I am doing the best I can.

Alicia: Well, join the club!

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Peter: I've looked in the mirror and what I've seen I don't like.

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Diane: This is a power play, pure and simple.

Will: Nothing here is pure and nothing here is simple.

--------------------------------------------------------

Kalinda: Alicia, you're a good lawyer, but you're always waiting for people to give you things.

--------------------------------------------------------

Cary: You like to think you're a good person. Maybe that used to be the case. But we both know you'll do whatever it takes.

--------------------------------------------------------

Alicia: I'm just so tired of this.

Kalinda: That's what people like Cary count on.

--------------------------------------------------------

Alicia: Poetry is easy; it's the parent-teacher conferences that are hard

Hermit

2010-06-04T14:11:00.008+08:00

Hermit is who I truly am - always going out on my own, taking a risk and leaving behind mediocrity in favour of what I truly want to do. There is no guarantee that what I have chosen is the right path, for the lantern only lights a short distance and I have somehow always only managed to glimpse a little of what lies ahead of me...then it diminishes...a good explanation why I fell so hard at times.

Strength is what I really need now to continue with the journey that I have started, for there is this overwhelming fear...slowly consuming me from within.

"History, despite its wrenching pain, cannot be unlived, but if faced with courage, need not be lived again" ~ Maya Angelou

2010-05-07T19:07:00.002+08:00

Bittersweet Autumn in Aussie - a symphony of permanence and change as I'm battling through the rat race.

2010-05-06T14:07:00.002+08:00

There's a long road between coherence and competence.

2010-04-05T22:08:00.001+08:00

What gives flight to our life is our imagination

2010-04-03T10:40:00.001+08:00

Well, if you want something badly enough, dreams have a way of coming true.

2010-03-29T09:39:00.002+08:00

The truth will set you free, it won't always make you happy.

2010-03-27T18:18:00.002+08:00

Ludwig van Beethoven's 'Immortal Beloved' Love Letters

2010-01-25T19:56:00.001+08:00

The First Letter
July 6, in the morning

My angel, my all, my very self - Only a few words today and at that with pencil (with yours) - Not till tomorrow will my lodgings be definitely determined upon - what a useless waste of time - Why this deep sorrow when necessity speaks - can our love endure except through sacrifices, through not demanding everything from one another; can you change the fact that you are not wholly mine, I not wholly thine - Oh God, look out into the beauties of nature and comfort your heart with that which must be - Love demands everything and that very justly - thus it is to me with you, and to your with me. But you forget so easily that I must live for me and for you; if we were wholly united you would feel the pain of it as little as I - My journey was a fearful one; I did not reach here until 4 o'clock yesterday morning. Lacking horses the post-coach chose another route, but what an awful one; at the stage before the last I was warned not to travel at night; I was made fearful of a forest, but that only made me the more eager - and I was wrong. The coach must needs break down on the wretched road, a bottomless mud road. Without such postilions as I had with me I should have remained stuck in the road. Esterhazy, traveling the usual road here, had the same fate with eight horses that I had with four - Yet I got some pleasure out of it, as I always do when I successfully overcome difficulties - Now a quick change to things internal from things external. We shall surely see each other soon; moreover, today I cannot share with you the thoughts I have had during these last few days touching my own life - If our hearts were always close together, I would have none of these. My heart is full of so many things to say to you - ah - there are moments when I feel that speech amounts to nothing at all - Cheer up - remain my true, my only treasure, my all as I am yours. The gods must send us the rest, what for us must and shall be -
Your faithful LUDWIG.

The Second Letter
Evening, Monday, July 6

You are suffering, my dearest creature - only now have I learned that letters must be posted very early in the morning on Mondays to Thursdays - the only days on which the mail-coach goes from here to K. - You are suffering - Ah, wherever I am, there you are also - I will arrange it with you and me that I can live with you. What a life!!! thus!!! without you - pursued by the goodness of mankind hither and thither - which I as little want to deserve as I deserve it - Humility of man towards man - it pains me - and when I consider myself in relation to the universe, what am I and what is He - whom we call the greatest - and yet - herein lies the divine in man - I weep when I reflect that you will probably not receive the first report from me until Saturday - Much as you love me - I love you more - But do not ever conceal yourself from me - good night - As I am taking the baths I must go to bed - Oh God - so near! so far! Is not our love truly a heavenly structure, and also as firm as the vault of heaven?

The Third Letter
Good morning, on July 7

Though still in bed, my thoughts go out to you, my Immortal Beloved, now and then joyfully, then sadly, waiting to learn whether or not fate will hear us - I can live only wholly with you or not at all - Yes, I am resolved to wander so long away from you until I can fly to your arms and say that I am really at home with you, and can send my soul enwrapped in you into the land of spirits - Yes, unhappily it must be so - You will be the more contained since you know my fidelity to you. No one else can ever possess my heart - never - never - Oh God, why must one be parted from one whom one so loves. And yet my life in V is now a wretched life - Your love makes me at once the happiest and the unhappiest of men - At my age I need a steady, quiet life - can that be so in our connection? My angel, I have just been told that the mailcoach goes every day - therefore I must close at once so that you may receive the letter at once - Be calm, only by a calm consideration of our existence can we achieve our purpose to live together - Be calm - love me - today - yesterday - what tearful longings for you - you - you - my life - my all - farewell. Oh continue to love me - never misjudge the most faithful heart of your beloved.
ever thine
ever mine
ever ours

CBS's primetime drama 'The Good Wife'

2010-01-06T19:43:00.002+08:00

Can so see myself addicted to CBS's primetime drama 'The Good Wife' that's showing in Ten Network soon! Yeah!

Call me a sadist but I actually like the slapping scene. It displayed the utter disappointment and hurt of a woman - by the man she loves.

Chris Noth still looks as dashing and charismatic as ever – you just can’t hate him, can you?

Jane Austen's all time classic

2010-01-02T18:26:00.012+08:00

Lose your heart
and
Come to your senses!

-------------------------------------------------

Marianne: Can he love her? Can the soul be really be satisfied with such polite affections? To love is to burn - to be on fire, like Juliet or Guinevere or Eloise... .

-------------------------------------------------

Elinor: Did he tell you he loved you?

Marianne: Yes... no. Never absolutely. It was everyday implied but never declared.

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Marianne: Love is not love which alters when it alteration finds. Or bends with the remover to remove. Oh no! It is an ever fixed mark that looks on tempests and is never shaken.

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Elinor: You have no confidence in me.

Marianne: This reproach from you. You who confide in no-one.

Elinor: I have nothing to tell.

Marianne: Nor I. Neither of us have anything to tell. I because I conceal nothing and you because you communicate nothing.

-------------------------------------------------

Elinor: What do you know of my heart? What do you know of anything but your own suffering. For weeks, Marianne, I've had this pressing on me without being at liberty to speak of it to a single creature. It was forced on me by the very person whose prior claims ruined all my hope. I have endured her exultations again and again whilst knowing myself to be divided from Edward forever. Believe me, Marianne, had I not been bound to silence I could have provided proof enough of a broken heart, even for you.

-------------------------------------------------

Elinor: Whatever his past actions, whatever his present course... at least you may be certain that he loved you.

Marianne: But not enough. Not enough.

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Elinor: Would you have him treat her even worse than Willoughby has treated you?

Marianne: No. But nor would I have him marry someone he does not love.

-------------------------------------------------

Colonel Brandon: Your sister seems very happy.

Elinor: Yes. Marianne does not approve of hiding her emotions. In fact, her romantic prejudices have the unfortunate tendency to set propriety at naught.

Colonel Brandon: She is wholly unspoilt.

Elinor: Rather too unspoilt, in my view. The sooner she becomes acquainted with the ways of the world, the better.

Colonel Brandon: I knew a lady very like your sister - the same impulsive sweetness of temper - who was forced into, as you put it, a better acquaintance with the world. The result was only ruination and despair. Do not desire it, Miss Dashwood.

“A part of you has grown in me. And so you see, it's you and me together forever and never apart, maybe in distance, but never in heart.”

2010-01-01T23:42:00.004+08:00

“I'd rather be a could-be if I cannot be an are; because a could-be is a maybe who is reaching for a star. I'd rather be a has-been than a might-have-been, by far; for a might have-been has never been, but a has was once an are.”

~Anonymous~

2009-12-31T21:04:00.003+08:00

Welcome to the New Year!

This is such a perfect time to think of
wishes you want to turn into realities
and goals you want to reach. It takes
a lot to set your sights on a distant
horizon and to keep on reaching for
those goals. It takes a lot... of courage
and hard work, believing and achieving,
patience and perseverance, inner
strength and gentle hope.

- by Collin McCarty

2009-12-31T08:42:00.003+08:00

"Year’s end is neither an end nor a beginning but a going on, with all the wisdom that experience can instill in us." ~ Har Borland

Another chance for me to get things right in the coming new year ;)

2009-12-26T15:23:00.000+08:00

I lurve 'Did you hear about the Morgans?' Aww...I'm such a sucker when it comes to romantic comedy ;) It's not the best romantic comedy I've seen but I lurve it's happy ending ;)

2009-12-26T11:20:00.000+08:00

You will be surprised that Australians are really crazy over Boxing Day Sale to the point that they will be in the stores at 6am to shop and there are long queues of people. Well, I am surprised!

Fonster's first semester results

2009-12-22T14:04:00.006+08:00

For my first semester, I scored 3 Distinctions and 1 Credit:

Business Transactions Law: Distinction (83)

Insurance Law: Distinction (78)

International Commercial Arbitration: Distinction (75)

Law of Business Enterprises: Credit (72)

For a gal who just wanted to pass all her subjects initially, not sure why I'm a little disappointed that I didn't get Distinctions for all my subjects.

Like my mom said, since I have already tried my best, probably I should be satisfied with what I have achieved and not put too much pressure on myself.

My Mom was right (so was my Mentor), I was (in fact, currently I still am) pretty wound up for the whole of 2009, putting too much pressure to achieve the targets and goals that I had set for myself, to the point that I have turned into a 'dull Jill'.

When things didn't turn out the way that I expected, despair and disappointments set in. There had been so many occasions in the last 6 months that I literally broke down. My Mentor has always been my best 'shrink' whenever there was a 'melt-down' situation. For that, I was grateful to Alexander Graham Bell for the invention of telephone.

2009 has not been that a fantastic year for me but it's no doubt an eventful and adventurous one. I think I deserve a pat on my back for hanging on and surviving quite well on my own despite in foreign land.

More changes and challenges to come in 2010 and I told myself to face them bravely and shout:

'BRING IT ON !'

I miss my mom :(

2009-12-17T20:16:00.002+08:00

Things are starting to shape up this Christmas and hope that it continues to stay that way...

2009-12-11T20:07:00.003+08:00

2009-11-28T14:19:00.002+08:00

Frustration and Despair are about to worn me out. Is it really worth putting up such a fight? I don't know. 'Living for oneself' comes with a price and I suppose I am paying for it now. My defences are really very weak now...sometimes I can really feel as if I am slowly...slowly...slowly...fading away... . If I have a remote control for my life, this is the phase that I will press the button 'fast forward'!!!

The last 72 hours had been a roller-coaster ride. Abso-fu*king-lutely glad that it’s over!

2009-11-24T18:28:00.000+08:00

Over 20,000 words in the short span of 8 weeks!!!
It's crazy!!!

I’m a gal from equatorial region & yet I couldn’t take this scorching heat of 40 degrees. I can’t write in this blazing heat – it’s knocking me out!

2009-11-22T11:30:00.000+08:00

I want to GO to New York City; NOT writing about 'New York Convention' & 'Washington Convention' !!!

2009-11-15T18:08:00.004+08:00

Definitely one of my travel destination within the next 5 years!

2009-11-11T01:06:00.003+08:00

“Sometimes we need to stop analyzing the past, stop planning the future, stop figuring out precisely how we feel, stop deciding exactly what we want, and just see what happens.”
-Carrie Bradshaw (Sex & The City)-

What I need to know about the past is that no matter what has happened, it has all worked together to bring me to this very moment.

2009-11-10T10:38:00.002+08:00

And this is the moment I can choose to make everything new. Right now.

"We all sit around in a circle and suppose, while the secret sits in the center and knows." Robert Frost

2009-11-09T21:58:00.001+08:00

What happened on Saturday was bizarre – is the ‘missing’ mutual or am I making a mountain out of a molehill?

2009-11-09T21:55:00.001+08:00

There is no 'Lost'

2009-11-07T09:51:00.005+08:00

There can't be any 'Lost', when you never ever have 'It' (in any instance) to begin with.

This is who I am

2009-11-06T13:26:00.009+08:00

I am who I am because I am the combination of a phoenix and an antelope.

An antelope that can't be tamed and a phoenix that burnt itself on a funeral pyre so that it can rise from the ashes with renewed youth to live through another cycle!

Decisions

2009-11-03T21:39:00.002+08:00

Probably in life, it doesn't really matter which side of the fence you get off sometimes. What matters most is getting off at the side of the fence that you feel most comfortable with & deemed it to be best for yourself, after having made that decision.

Letting Go

2009-11-02T00:36:00.004+08:00

Letting go is a hell hard lesson in life because whilst it is easy to form ‘attachment’, it can be quite a painful experience and feeling when one realised that it's time to let go.

Nevertheless, there are times when the situation has changed to the extent that it's necessary to let go of that ‘attachment’, so that one can fulfill one’s life path.

Even though the past memories can be tormenting and serve as roadblocks but one may still choose to hold on. But it is only through leaving those tormenting memories behind and taking a leap of faith into the unknown could life be allowed to reveal what one is truly capable of becoming.

It takes time…but I know I can eventually free myself from whatever chains I have confined myself with.

I have done it before and I will do it again.

Recalling the word 'fancy' is frustrating after knowing what it can actually imply. Duh-Dumbwit!

2009-11-01T21:23:00.009+08:00

Memorable quotes for: Something's Gotta Give (2003)

2009-10-31T21:06:00.010+08:00

TO

2009-10-31T18:17:00.003+08:00

There were people who came and went in my life and there were people that I had eventually let go. And maybe one day I could erase you from my memory too. But right now, I just feel that I really do miss...you... .

The Imaginarium Springtime

2009-10-31T12:00:00.007+08:00

I got up early this morning despite sleeping only at 4a.m. Finished writing a major paper so decided to give myself a little movie treat:

The Imaginarium of Doctor Parnassus

(The Js are in it so how can I miss it right?)

Took a walk after the movie around the suburb that I am currently living in.

It was as if I were in an imaginarium land of my own...it was really a very peaceful & relaxing walk especially when I didn't have the luxury of time to do it often these days.

I was glad that I took a little time to enjoy 'spring'...before it slips just pass me... .

Another day of reflection...

2009-10-29T13:00:00.005+08:00

When life gets tough, the tough gets going!

Faith - Gail Devers

2009-10-24T18:21:00.002+08:00

“Keep your dreams alive. Understand to achieve anything requires faith and belief in yourself, vision, hard work, determination, and dedication. Remember all things are possible for those who believe.”

- Gail Devers -

Balance

2009-10-24T14:33:00.004+08:00

Balance is no place - it is a becoming.
It is a lovely tension:
between holding on and letting go;
risk and safety;
up and down.

Untitled - Simple Plan

2009-10-24T09:27:00.001+08:00

I open my eyes
I try to see but I'm blinded by the white light
I can't remember how
I can't remember why
I'm lyin' here tonight
And I can't stand the pain
And I can't make it go away
No I can't stand the pain

Chorus:
How could this happen to me?
I've made my mistakes
got nowhere to run
the night goes on
as I'm fadin' away
I'm sick of this life
I just wanna scream
How could this happen to me?

Everybody's screamin'
I try to make a sound but no one hears me
I'm slippin' off the edge
I'm hangin' by a thread
I wanna start this over again

So I try to hold onto a time when nothing mattered
And I can't explain what happened
And I can't erase the things that I've done
No I can't

How could this happen to me?
I've made my mistakes
got nowhere to run
the night goes on
As I'm fadin' away
I'm sick of this life
I just wanna scream
How could this happen to me?

I've made my mistakes
got nowhere to run
the night goes on
as I'm fading away
I'm sick of this life
I just wanna scream
How could this happen to me?

- Happy Birthday Dad -

2009-10-07T11:07:00.006+08:00

Even though we have already been separated for 14 years, nevertheless I will always remember that 7th Oct was your birthday. Happy Birthday Dad and I do miss your jesting manner of calling me 'Miss Piggy'.

I am asking: 'What's my destiny & where's my final destination going to be?'

2009-09-30T18:42:00.001+08:00

Struggle

2009-09-30T10:16:00.006+08:00

I am struggling… … .

One long lonely struggle, in the dark, with the invisible and inevitable.

I have to do it for that was what I have chosen to be my destiny.

With the hope that opportunity will follow struggle for that was what I was told - that opportunity follows effort and hard work, it doesn't come before.

Emotion Release

2009-09-22T10:49:00.001+08:00

You need to become conscious of your bonds before you can break them. This awareness can be more painful than the preceding ignorance. It is the Necessary Stage, because without experiencing this legitimate suffering you may not become whole again.

Whenever I feel like giving up, I tell myself to remember why I held on for so long in the first place

2009-09-06T22:26:00.001+08:00

Love for attention & affection ≠ Love

2009-08-23T22:36:00.004+08:00

I had a conversation with a friend yesterday. A casual remark from her set me to ponder on the following:

How often do lonely souls out there confuse 'the love for attention & affection' with 'love'
&
hence (subconsciously) resulting them to settle for something less / incompatible ?

The Fool

2009-08-20T19:16:00.008+08:00

Paul Fenton-Smith, the author of 'The Tarot Revealed', said in his book:

"The Fool is a card for spontaneous action. A time to leap out of a situation, or a time to enjoy the day for what it is.

'Sufficient to the day, the joys therein'

is an old saying that fits this card. The Fool can appear when you are about to take a risk which those around you would caution against.

Take the risk. Do it anyway. The Fool suggests that the road to fulfilment is through spontaneous action and that long-term plans will be crystalised later on."

-----------------------

抽到愚人牌的建議：

傻一點，世界就會美麗會一點；
只要今天是快樂的，今天就是充實的！
何必管別人怎麽看！只要不傷害到別人，
盡量放大膽跨步去做吧！

Free Will Astrology by Rob Brezsny

2009-08-20T13:45:00.005+08:00

Rob Brezsny is a columnist for 'Sydney City News: Free Will Astrology'.

I particularly love the segment that he wrote on 13th August 2009 for 'Aquarius', as quoted below:

"In the days ahead, you may not realize what you're looking for until you find it. I advise you, therefore, to put into action the following five-point plan.

1) Suppress any know-it-all tendencies you might have.

2) Revive your childhood talent for being voraciously curious about everything.

3) Ask more questions than you've ever asked before.

4) Figure out how to be receptive without being passive, and how you can be humble without muffling with your self-confidence.

5) Consider the possibility that you have a lot to learn about what's best for you. "

Simple - it's all bullshitting!!!

2009-08-06T23:31:00.002+08:00

Although I am an advocate for keeping things simple & straight-forward, in my opinion, it can't be done ( even harder the older you get). This is for the very fact that human beings by nature like to complicate matters (we subconsciously just love the thrill of it). Moreover, there is this fear within us - the fear of failure; the fear of rejection. So we hide, we pretend. For better or for worse? To be honest, I don't think anyone can give a definite answer... ...

Focus - on knowing why I am here and what I need to do.

2009-08-06T15:29:00.000+08:00

Scenic route to progress

2009-08-03T20:55:00.005+08:00

I adapted the following phrase after reading the MX papers in Sydney today:

"If the option is slogging in Singapore, getting increasingly disillusioned or going overseas, having an experience and developing my skills, why not go overseas?"

Unexamined Life

2009-07-21T11:15:00.002+08:00

Whoever said the unexamined life is not worth living apparently never intended to go into book publishing, where there is almost no research and where much of the conventional wisdom is a pastiche of folklore, myth and wishful thinking.

-- Edwin McDowell, "Publishing: And They All Said It Wouldn't Sell", New York Times, February 6, 1989

Criticism

2009-06-17T11:16:00.007+08:00

Here's an anonymous quote to keep in mind:

"Criticism, in a way, is a compliment;
it shows you did something too important for the critics to ignore."

Cee-Lo - Kung Fu Fighting (feat. Jack Black)

2009-05-27T10:01:00.010+08:00

----------------------------------

I know what's forward for me is exciting and I am doing the right thing. But somehow 'nervousness’ creeps in from time to time.
Love the ‘Kung Fu Fighting’ remix featured in ‘Kung Fu Panda’ - it reminds me to
‘Always Believe’
& gives me the inspiration & courage to continue the path that I have chosen.

----------------------------------

Oogway: There are no accidents.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Po: Maybe I should just quit and go back to making noodles.

Oogway:

Quit, don't quit? Noodles, don't noodles? You are too concerned about what was and what will be. There is a saying: yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, but today is a gift. That is why it is called the "present."

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Oogway:

My friend, the panda will never fulfill his destiny, nor you yours until you let go of the illusion of control.

Shifu: Illusion?

Oogway: Yes. [points at peach tree]
Look at this tree, Shifu: I cannot make it blossom when it suits me nor make it bear fruit before its time.

Shifu:

But there are things we *can* control: I can control when the fruit will fall, I can control where to plant the seed: that is no illusion, Master!

Oogway:

Ah, yes. But no matter what you do, that seed will grow to be a peach tree. You may wish for an apple or an orange, but you will get a peach.

Shifu: But a peach cannot defeat Tai Lung!

Oogway: Maybe it can, if you are willing to guide, to nurture it, to believe in it.

Shifu: But how? How? I need your help, master.

Oogway: No, you just need to believe. Promise me, Shifu, promise me you will believe.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Po: You never believed that! From the first moment I got here, you've been trying to get rid of me! [Shifu knocks him to the ground]

Shifu: Yes! I was! But now I ask you to trust in your master as I have come to trust in mine.

Po: You're not my master. And I'm not the Dragon Warrior.

Shifu: Then why didn't you quit? You knew I was trying to get rid of you, yet you stayed!

Po: Yeah, I stayed. I stayed because everytime you threw a brick at my head or said I smelled; it hurt, but it could never hurt more than everyday of my life just being me. I stayed because I thought if anyone can change me, can make me not me, it was you! The greatest kung fu teacher in all of China!

Shifu: I can change you! I can turn you into the Dragon Warrior! And I will!

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Po: But dad, didn't you ever, I don't know, want to do something else? Something besides noodles?

Mr. Ping: Actually, when I was young and crazy, I thought about running away and learning how to make tofu.

Po: So why didn't you?

Mr. Ping: Oh, because it was a stupid dream; can you imagine *me* making tofu? [laughs airily]

Mr. Ping: No: we all have our place in this world: mine is here, and yours is...

Po: I know: here.

Mr. Ping: [throws Po bowls of soup to catch] No, it's at tables two, five, seven and twelve. Service with a smile!

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Cee-Lo - Kung Fu Fighting (feat. Jack Black) Lyrics:

Hoh-hoh-hoah
Oh-hoh-hoh-hoah
Oh-hoh-hoh-hoah
Oh-hoh-hoh-hoah

Coz everybody is Kung Fu Fighting
Your mind becomes fast as lightning
Although the future is a little bit frightening
It's the book of your life that you're writing

You're a diamond in the rough, a brilliant ball of clay
You could be a work of art, if you just go all the way
Now what would it take to break, I believe that you can bend
Not only do you have to fight, but you have got to win

Coz everybody is Kung Fu Fighting
Your mind becomes fast as lightning
Although the future is a little bit frightening
It's the book of your life that you're writing

Oooooouuhhh

You are a natural, why is it so hard to see ?
Maybe it's just because you keep on looking at me
The journey's a lonely one, so much more than we know
But sometimes you've got to go, go on and be your own hero

Coz everybody is Kung Fu Fighting
Your mind becomes fast as lightning
Although the future is a little bit frightening
It's the book of your life that you're writing

Hoh-hoh-hoah
Oh-hoh-hoh-hoah
Oh-hoh-hoh-hoah
Oh-hoh-hoh-hoah

Coz everybody is Kung Fu Fighting
Your mind becomes fast as lightning
Although the future is a little bit frighteningIt's the book of your life that you're writing.

'Decisive' or 'Impulsive' ? I suppose it doesn't really matter... ...

2009-05-17T18:37:00.009+08:00

I would term it as 'decisive' wherever my decision turned out to be a pleasant experience; 'impulsive' if the experience was a 'rocky' one.

Be it a good or bad experience, I never regret any decision I made. I learned and grown to be mature - from the results of my decisions.

Dreams ('Impossible Princess' Album) - Kylie Minogue

2009-04-03T00:40:00.001+08:00

To have any man but to love only one
To wake with the moon and sleep with the sun
To be a sinner a saint, a lover and friend
To know a beginning but never an end
To fly in the ocean, swim in the skies
Believer in truth, defendant of lies
To be of purest love, the deepest pain
To be lost and found again and again and again
These are the dreams
Of an impossible princess
To know the power of wealth and poverty
To taste every moment and try everything
To be hailed as a hero, branded a fool
Believe in the sacred and break every rule
To give into pleasure with no boundaries
Living in chaos and harmony
To feel the touch of a man, a woman's caress
To know the limits of torture and tenderness
These are the dreams
Of an impossible princess
Man and woman boy and girl
They want to escape this world
(Nothing's what it seems)
These are the dreams of an impossible princess
It's a way of dealing with all the feeling
Keep believing in dreams

Written: Kylie Minogue/ Steve Anderson/ David Seaman

The 'Untouchable' DVD Rom

2009-03-27T21:57:00.008+08:00

No matter how good I had been at discluttering my 'past' in the last two years, I don't understand why I could never bring myself to throw away that DVD Rom. Moreover, it was not a gift that was meant only for me. Ironically, I had long dumped those that were meant for me and yet I kept this plain white labeled DVD ROM with the word 'jokey' written on it - *can faint*.

For memory sake, or sub-consciously the feelings have never quite subsided? Why did my heart still palpitate when I rewatched the video clip?

It can't be. That episode was way long over - not to mention the staging of the 'perfect stranger passer-by' act in London plus I had my other fair share of life experiences during these two years.

What's gotten into me tonight? In honesty, I can't quite figure out. I must be hallucinating dramas again given that I am too bored from crunching my exam notes. * Wakey Wakey* This year, my goal is to be neither the rule nor the exception. I just want to breathe and plough through 2009 with my books.

Otherwise - Artist(Band): Morcheeba

2009-03-26T17:48:00.001+08:00

They wanted me here
Just to show you my face
But when it comes to the crunch
I just hide in disgrace
You're calling me mad
But i know you're the same
Cause you got to be seen to be playing the game
Yes we got to be seen to be playing, the game

It ain't gonna hurt now
If you open up your eyes
You're making it worse now
Everytime you criticise
I'm under your curse now
But I call it compromise
I thought that you were wise
But you were otherwise

A specimen like you
I would love to obtain
I asked a tedious guy if he'd tell me your name
I'd love to impress you
With a back sumersault
I wanna take up your love
But it's locked in a vault
I wanna take up your love
But it's locked in a vault

It ain't gonna hurt now
If you open up your eyes
You're making it worse now
Everytime you criticise
I'm under your curse now
But I call it compromise
I thought that you were wise
But you were otherwise

When i open my mouth
thoughts are brutally honest
And i can't expect that kind of love from you
When you open your mouth
Your teeth are beautifully polished
And i can't extract the pain you're going through
No i can't explain
The pain you're going through

It ain't gonna hurt now
If you open up your eyes
You're making it worse now
Everytime you womanise
I'm under your curse now
But I call it compromise
I'm under your curse

It ain't gonna hurt now
If you open up your eyes
You're making it worse now
Everytime you criticise
I'm under your curse now
But I call it compromise
I thought that you were wise
But you were otherwise

I Love My Life

2009-03-24T23:30:00.002+08:00

"Love Your Life.
Believe In Your Own Potential.
Wake Up Each Day With The Awe Of
Just Being Alive.
Forget The Past.
Take The Power To Choose What
You Want To Do
And Do It Well.
Open Your Heart
And Your Mind
To Every
Opportunity.
Don't Be Afraid
To Keep Trying.
Create Your
Own Dreams.
Colour Your Life
With People And
Things You Love.
Focus On All
That Is Good.
Life Always Gets
Better With A
Positive Attitude!"

A Positive Spin

2009-03-20T01:36:00.006+08:00

It was said in the movie:

'We are the RULE, not the EXCEPTION'

I would like to give it a positive spin (yet realistic - I think):

'If We are not the EXCEPTION, then They are NOT MEANT for Us'

It will be a simple game from now on...

2009-03-16T23:08:00.011+08:00

I will concentrate on how I feel because that's what's important.

Those dreaded feelings of insecurity are good indications that 'probably it's not meant to be', because I would not feel that way if it should belong to me.

'Live well and the world will open its doors. Live poorly and the world will slam them in your face'

- Greg Behrendt-